When Will You Do Your Family 360?

If it’s good enough for work, isn’t it good enough for home?

The 360-feedback process is a staple of corporate life.

In case you’re not familiar with it, it’s a feedback process in which a person solicits and receives feedback from everyone around them, i.e. their manager, peers, direct reports/colleagues, and others. The process is often done online, the results are shared with the person, and typically the feedback is presented by cohort, as in, “Here’s the feedback from your manager, your peers, and your direct reports/colleagues.” The feedback received is often in the form of written comments as well as about specific leadership behaviors.

Although some leaders may feel they’re being rated, when done well, the process is focused more on underscoring which leadership behaviors are working well, and which need to be tweaked. The end goal is greater self-awareness, growth and development by fostering increased curiosity and insight.

Having done leadership development for more than two decades, the one thing I’m surprised by is that 360s aren’t done in families. If you’re receiving feedback at work, wouldn’t you, at minimum, want to receive feedback from those you love the most?

So I decided to create one online, and send it to my immediate family. As a husband and father, I was interested in what I’ve done and am doing well, and also where I missed the mark and could do better going forward.
Once I receive feedback from each family member, I’ll meet with them individually to review and discuss their feedback.

If you’re interested in doing the same in your family, here are some suggestions:

• Keep it short. The focus of the feedback can be quite emotional, and some might find it a bit challenging. So make it as easy as possible for your family members.
• As noted above, for the first iteration, I’d do the survey online, and not in person. Doing it in person could be a bit intense, and I think most people would like some time to reflect on the questions and their answers to them. I know I would.
• Be aware that you’re asking for honest feedback, just like at your company. So don’t be surprised if your family is honest. But isn’t that what you truly want? If you don’t, then don’t bother asking for the feedback.
• Make sure you follow up with each family member in person or virtually (and not via text or email) to discuss their feedback, get clarification, and confirm what you need to do going forward to be a better version of yourself for that family member.

For those who might think it’s a bit funny to do a “family 360”, I’d submit that if it’s good enough to do at work as a leader, it’s certainly worth doing at home as a spouse, parent, and partner.

If you’re interested in learning more about the questions I asked and my impression of the overall experience, feel free to email me at [email protected].